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Is there anything to make a person feel more pathetic than being sick and having to care for your self? No. No, there is not. I’ve been valiantly staving off a cold and sinus infection for two days now and finally, my three white blood cells have given up the ghost. My head is achy and throbbing. My eyes are watering. My nose is running, except when it is entirely plugged. There is a distinct…mucus…thing going on in my mouth. I think I have a fever.

All of the things of life, the liquids and unguents, potions and most importantly, snacks, are allĀ over there. I do not understand it. Why must everything be over there? Why can’t it be here, in bed with me? I am doing my best to set up a little nest of comfort and healing but I keep having to get up in order to find that other thing I forgot to get on my last trip. Whhyyyyy? Augh.

Saturday, I went to the Farmer’s Market and the good butcher and bought groceries of good intention. I have everything I need to make a nice pot of chili but I don’t wanna. A cup of tea would be nice but I have to make it. I’m supposed to start my fall bread baking project today. [insert hollow laugh]

What would I give for clean sheets? Everything. Take all of my money. Clean sheets are the best. Clean sheets that smell of lavender and eucalyptus, fresh from the dryer, man that stuff is the bomb. My mother took care of me often during my cancer treatment. She would always make a point of having my bed turned down, hotel-style, with fresh sheets and pillows fluffed and a little herbal smelling good spray and a candle ready for me after my bath, which she also had to help me with. We would have a cup of tea and a little sweet treat and she would wait until I had drifted off to sleep before she would leave and return to her own home. The love was everywhere, all over me.

Those kinds of things don’t happen very often, especially to me. I loved that feeling of being cared for, the physical touch of love and comfort from another person. It’s magical. The next time someone you love is sick, go and be with them. Maybe they don’t want company but you could take them some soup. Drop it off at the back door if you have to. Or brownies. Fried chicken. Something. Be present. If they’ll let you, make them go lay on the sofa so you can change their sheets.

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